Greetings dear readers. I hope you had an excellent Christmas and that you found some pretty things under the tree. Today I’d like to share some thoughts about underdressing. Most likely, you and I are in the same boat. I can’t really wear outerwear beyond the privacy of my own home. Perhaps some of you can pass and outerwear is an option. If so, good for you! Frankly, I am a very long way from passing and, living in a very conservative part of the country, I’d have to have a death wish to even try.
All that being said, we can still connect with the inner femme by underdressing. There are so many wonderful options – panties, bras, camisoles, garters with stockings. Ah, such fun. By the by, I didn’t include pantyhose. If you can wear them, more power to you. I tried it a couple of times, but by the end of the day, I felt like I had been cut in half and neutered. Not a nice feeling.
Do you underdress for work? I have found that underdressing under my power suit has greatly reduced the stress of my job. I like sitting in a meeting with all the other power suits and feeling the caress of my bra and thinking, “If only you knew.” If you have to put on your binary male face at work, that makes it even more fun.
There is nothing more comfy than feeling the slinky smoothness of a camisole under a dress shirt. If you are more of a blue collar worker, a cami may not be the best idea, but you can certainly enjoy some nice satin panties. I had an internet friend who unintentionally outed himself at work. He works on a high voltage power crew. He was wearing a thong. His tee shirt was untucked and he was bending over working on something and his whale tale was exposed. Busted! A coworker pulled him aside and said “You’d better pull your pants up.” The coworker fortunately was cool with it and made no further comments.
So much for work. What about in your leisure time? What do you like to wear under it all when you go to the mall or grocery store? In moderate weather, I enjoy wearing a garter belt and hose under my jeans. I only wear women’s jeans, and if you haven’t tried them, you really must. They are far more comfy than those heavy, scratchy men’s jeans. The denim is thick enough that the garter tabs don’t show.
How about when you go to the doctor? I’ve chatted with some folks online who wear panties to their doctor’s visit and the doctor is fine with it. Is yours? Mine absolutely would not be fine with it. Funny story: a couple of years ago I was getting dressed and felt something sticking the sole of my right foot. I lifted my foot, only to discover I was standing on a wasp. That hurt like a bad dog. I’m allergic to wasps, so my wife packed me in to the car and off to my doctor’s office we went. I had on lacy pink panties and didn’t even give it a thought. We got there and the doc examined my foot. He told me to stand up and drop my drawers so he could give me a steroid injection in my hip. My wife and I looked at each other like a couple of deer in the headlights. Fortunately, the doc had his back to me as he prepared the syringe. I pulled my pants down while concealing my panties well beneath them. In retrospect it is really funny - especially the look of panic my wife and I gave each other. Ah, the challenges of being a cross dresser!
Just for fun, I looked up the Latin translation of “If only you knew” and it is “Si modo iam nosceres”. What do you think – could we form a sorority with the motto “Si modo iam nosceres”? Heck we could even have tee shirts with our motto emblazoned on the front. It could be our secret handshake when we encounter each other at the mall.
So much for my ramblings. I’d love for you to share your thoughts and experiences in the wonderful world of underdressing. Get that keyboard warmed up – I’m waiting to hear from you!
Although my fianceé knows I wear thongs and lace underwear and honestly she doesn’t mind it, if anything she thinks it’s kinda hot, I’ve even tried on undies for her, but she doesn’t quite know I like some femme things like garters and pantyhose and heels. It’s a borderline thing. She doesnt mind if I wear mens heeled boots during roleplay or with a sexy costume but she doesnt know I also like wearing stilettos in private. She knows I wear thongs and all sorts of sexy things but doesn’t know I love stockings. I think she’s very okay with my underwear obsession as long as it’s made for men. She always knows I wear harnesses and finds them very hot. But there is a fine line. I don’t think she would like if I wore women’s heels. She’s quite okay with me wearing feminine things but as long as it was designed for men in mind. Which I can totally understand. But if your girlfriend or wife knows your sexy underwear obsession and is totally fine with it, it makes things 100% better.
Great to hear the joy in your words
I feel you
I too had a special similar day today
Lace briefs from xd womens skinny jeans
Toes freshly pedicured black cami from xd
Felt so good to be me
I had a wonderful day out in my underdressed style during the week. Matching lace, lilac panties and bra underneath my suit and shirt. Xdress foam inserts in my bra – a nicely understated size (well done Xd) and opaque hold ups underneath my trousers. I can’t tell you how good and true to myself I felt – on the train, in cafes, walking down the street, shopping. It was gorgeous.
I have worn knickers for about 40years,
A couple of years ago at work my tee shirt must have rose up to expose my Lacey knickers in the breakout area ( brew room ), shortly after that I was on site with a male and female colleagues, the female never used the breakout area., When she approached me and asked if I wore knickers, I went red faced and admitted I did and realized the male colleague must have told her , I can only imagine the comments made behind my back at work ? O well it must be common knowledge now that I underdress, I am over it now even though it was very embarrassing, I still underdress as it is who I am and my wife loves the look and more she likes the feel of the material in bed, and sometimes puts silky night wear out for me to wear.
Wishing everyone s happy underdressing life.
I totally agree with your comments Andrew. I find men’s underwear ugly and uncomfortable. For years I have been wearing what I want—I tend to live by my own rules anyway.
Hello, my dear friends! My name is Andrew. I have some questions! Who made the rules about clothes? Who is that man?I have never seen him yet! Do you know him? Why all the men have to wear an ugly underwear? So, myown rules! I want to wear a nice lace lingerie! I do it right now! I do this every day! It is my life!
Ally and Stevie, you are the best! There is nothing like wearing panties and bra under your men’s suit to remind you of who you really are. The stockings are just an extra touch. You might want to consider wearing a satin cami also, just for that extra something. As far as nail polish, I wear clear polish that supposedly strengthens my nails. I have a real problem with splitting nails. All the folks around me just accept it as part of who I am, in addition to wearing stud earrings, and I never get negative comments. Dress pretty, my dear friends!
Some super conversations going on here. I was in Xdress perfect lace purple panties and bra all day yesterday and felt fantastic. Reference nail polish, I rather like the nude varieties. I find they are quite subtle and look well with a suit and light make up.
Happy dressing to everybody. This is a wonderful conversation. We need to be out as our femme selves more!
More power to you! Its great to be free to wear want you want when yku want. This is a great forum for discussion and friendship
It is great to see everyone here coming together and sharing their experiences. I feel this is almost essential in providing us the feeling of normalcy, opposed to the rejection some of us may feel due to societies standards.
Since I last posted, I have started dressing publicly. Last Saturday I got some pants fitted at the tailor, went to the mall, and had lunch with my girlfriend while wearing pantyhose, 2" booties, and an asymmetric LBD. I also wore a long line hoodie over it, and some eyeliner and jewelry to put it all together.
I was nervous, but my girlfriend kept assuring me it would only be weird if I made it so. She was right, and I now apply that way of thinking every morning when I decide what to wear, and you should too. Since Monday, I have been dressing completely to work as well. The aforementioned long line hoodie has been worn each day, with pantyhose and either a midi skirt or dress underneath.
I have gone to several places after work wearing these outfits, and have yet to receive any negative comments. In fact, the only comments I have received thus far were positive (three so far). This is extremely validating and inspires me to share these experiences with you all, in hopes it may motivate anyone who is struggling with the confidence to dress publicly, like I was.
I too paint both my toe and fingernails, usually black though as my style is Gothic. I would also like to try some deep purples or reds. (Hint: I want some of these shades for bras/panties on this website!) I also love hosiery, so I wear pantyhose almost everyday. I will transition to stockings once the weather gets warmer though, as pantyhose can make the private areas a bit warm after 8 hours of working.
My shoe choice today is a bit more feminine than the previous times I’ve dressed publicly, as I am wearing 5" knee high boots. Moving up to these after wearing the booties for a few days made it far less intimidating. Speaking of which, once I wore all of these outfits both in public and at work, I no longer feel intimidation.
As per my original statement, sharing these experiences can help us gain the much needed confidence we all strive for to be ourselves. If you haven’t already, create an account on Quora. It’s a social media site in which you can follow several topics and ask questions/share experiences on them.
Have a great day everyone, and remember: If it’s both scary and awesome, you should definitely pursue it.
Yes love me some toenail polish, that’s one of the reasons I started xdressing but that’s another conversation. I agree the garter belt thigh highs are prettier but I cant pull that off at work, I can wear the stay ups without any problem.
I love this blog
Wear something femme today!
Ah Stevie, so you like toenail polish too? My fav is frost pink. When I go to my esthetician, she always compliments me on my toenail polish. As far as the thigh high hose, a word to the wise. I like thigh high stay ups. One day I wore them to work and just kept them on the rest of the evening. Bad idea. The silicone bands around the thighs that keep them up left me with a hicky all the way around me thighs! That’s when I went to garter belts and hose. Looks prettier anyway.
I feel you on that.
I’ve developed my own hybrid style that includes panty and matching bra
Occasionally stockings I prefer thigh highs, I add a morning face treatment and some make up.
And keep my toes polished and I’m good.
I’ve been underdressing for a while now and find it tremendously empowering in expressing my feminine side. I’ll often wear Xdress matching bra and panty sets under a suit and shirt together with opaque hold-ups. If I’m feeling a little more adventurous and know I’ll be on safe territory I’ll also put on a pair of mid-height ankle boots with a neither broad nor stilletto heel and insert some Xdress pads into my bra. A touch of make-up finishes it off. Taking these small steps one by one has helped me find my own style and grow in confidence. It’s amazing how many people don’t bat an eyelid.
Kathia, welcome to our little sorority and XD and BA. As far as wearing a bra to work, XD sells many bras that won’t give projection (meaning giving you a bust line) and can safely be worn under a shirt. Of course, it depends on what kind of work you do and what kind of shirts you wear at work. My work involved dress clothes, and bras worked just fine under heavier weave shirts. If your work involves wearing only a tee shirt, that could be a problem. Good luck, and again, welcome!
Hi Angie. I just found this place. I have always wear pantyhose, men’s and women’s. For the first time I found a place that make lingerie for us. So my first instinct was to buy some bras. I haven’t got the courage to wear them, to underdressing them at my office, someday I’ll try. I have found that is very difficult that people would find out. I wear garter belts and stockings and even if the garter tabs shows, people does not notice, and of course that makes it more fun. All the time I’m thinking “If only you knew”.
I agree with you; if these clothes are men’s lingerie then whats the big deal? Its not even crossdressing! I started with women’s panties and I still wear then BUT xdress and Bodyaware are Men’s Lingerie so I can wear as normal underwear even the bras
Angie I’m anxiously awaiting the next blog topic
I believe that if it is made for a man, and a man is wearing it, there should be no guilt. Although I started out wearing women’s underwear, the fit just wasn’t right. Being caught by anyone in women’s underwear would be embarrassing to me, but I feel differently when I know it is men’s underwear. I love the fabric, but I also love the support, and in my opinion a thong provides support just like a jock strap, only a thong disappears and a jockstrap I feel all day.
I also love pantyhose; however, other brands have made these for men and they feel fantastic. I also love the look of garters, but have not built up the courage to wear them out.
Maybe someone could write a blog for others who are new to the girly thing? Anyway, I am so glad I found BA and XD…they make my day…everyday!
I love the term “underdressing”, I honestly can’t think of a better way to describe what it is that I do and XDress has made doing it so rewarding. Woman’s panties are of course fantastic and they worked well enough but they aren’t made specifically for us. This company and their products have made being me everything it should be!
I work in the oil and gas industry, out in the field, and I wear panties and pantyhose or tights (depending on the time of year) every day under my fireproof overalls and I love it. I feel like I have some kind of advantage over everyone I work with, like they have no clue what their missing. Just like I think you may be missing out on pantyhose, it rang my undressing bell at a young age and is the whole reason I do it. There are so many colors, styles, thickness’, finishes, feels and looks, you just need to know where to look and to not stop looking until you find the right ones. My wife’s leg-wear drawer barely rivals mine and more then half of the pairs she has are only because I’ve recommended them to her, I’d say she’s pretty lucky to have a guy like me ; ). And for me there’s nothing more fun then wearing pantyhose with torn jeans, its like undressing with just a hint of outer dressing.
Take care, have fun and thank you so much for the opportunity you’ve given us all.
Thanks Angie glad to have a “sister” in Dress!
For those who want to dress but can’t this is a great way anddont forget the nail polish on your toes (looks much better if professionally done)
Thank you for responding
I have thought about chunky heeled booties and long tall sally has 14-16 sized shoes
It would still be a little hard in my town but if going 20-30 miles away i could pull it off
Femme jeans no one notices
Femme sweaters no on notices
Pair a bra panty match add a little foundation is my preferred weekend garb
I m working on the booties
Thanks again Nathan
Stevie, you and I are very close together, in terms of outer wear. It is pretty cool here, so daily I wear tights under my women’s skinny jeans, matching panties and bra most days (those wonderful matching satin sets by Xdress), light foundation makeup, and frost pink polish on my toes. There are a lot of choices in androgynous sweaters. Have fun, dear friend!
Stevie, I would say if you have confidence to wear both makeup and fem outerwear in public, go all in with the heels. Perhaps they don’t have to be 4-6" sparkly heels or something, but even 2-3"chunky heeled booties will grant the same effect essentially. The plus side to booties is they look pretty androgynous in most styles, so you wouldn’t feel too out of place wearing them.
When I first started cross-dressing daily, I went all in with the feminine stuff so it was all lace, mesh, frills, etc. As far as shoes go, they were all very feminine and had heels of 4" or higher. I didn’t really consider the fact that I would need more unisexual items first for public outings, so that is next on my list.
We can still satisfy our need to wear fem clothing by wearing things that don’t make us stand out too much (unisexual/androgynous options), and I think that is the key to feeling confident and anxiety-free in public.
The first couple times I went out in public dressed up, it was all very feminine and resulted in me not having the confidence to get out of the car. If wearing unisexual clothes/shoes first can build enough confidence to wear feminine clothing eventually without worry, I say that is the way to go.
I was just thinking about part of this blog edition and Angie you asked what we wear under our leisure clothes?
Well, while I do take chances at work if I’m wearing enough clothing, I feel the weekend is mine.
So out come the panties and bra matching set and in cold weather footless stocking tights or thigh highs
I keep nail polish on my toes so some light foundation and a little mascara with my straight leg or skinny jeans, a femme sweater and I’m in femme business. No one cares to say a thing, because I still look male.
For some of us there is no desire to transform just the desire to feel femme sexy and good.
The only thing I haven’t tried because of where I live is heels out and about.
“Si modo iam nosceres” – I can dig it!
Also Angie, “Thank goodness for sites like Xdress where we can discover we aren’t just some isolated weirdo” – aaaaaaaaabsolutely yes.
I work in construction management, I’m a pretty big guy. Fit, just 6-1/2’ tall. I absolutely love the juxtaposition of under dressing some nice satin and lace stuff under the flannel and jeans. No one would suspect a thing. On super cold days I happily bust out some comfy leggings too.
Keep up the good work! Love these products and I own a bunch, dig the blog posts too this is just the first one I’ve replied to.