Greetings everyone! Today I hope to inspire you, as I'm sure many of you are frustrated by the negative stereotyping and stigmatizing that we all face in our daily lives by presenting ourselves in a feminine manner.
To start, a lot of the stigmas that we face have been brought on throughout decades of people like us hiding in the shadows. In doing so, the rest of society has become very ignorant as to who we are, why we do what we do, and what it means to us. We all have gotten one of the two assumptions: we're gay, or we want to be women. For some that may be true, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. However, the vast majority of us are straight, cis-gendered men.
In recent weeks, I have openly dressed in front of several individuals that had no idea about this side of me. Namely, it was my two sisters, one of their boyfriends, and stepdad. Out of these four, only one seemed to have a problem with it, which was my younger sister. She wasn't able to understand that I was not gay, and called it a "phase". These comments were made behind my back, so I wasn't able to respond accordingly. Luckily, my other sister explained to her that I have been in a relationship with a beautiful woman for over five years.
This example is just one of the many experiences that come along with being openly feminine. However, none of these situations deter me from being myself. While the opinions of immediate family or friends can hurt sometimes, it is important to understand that we live our lives for ourselves, and not according to anyone else's comforts. True friends and family will not judge you on this alone, and will still love and accept you regardless.
I have read many of your comments throughout various blogs, and it always saddens me when I read about those who do not have the confidence to wear the clothes they love openly, due to their fears of what others may think. I deeply empathize with this, as I was once in the same unfortunate position.
However, I have noticed many of you still underdress daily, as well as wear light makeup and perhaps a unisex top or bottom that goes unnoticed. Some of you also have wonderful partners in your life that encourage you to be your fullest self. So what is holding you back? Perhaps it's your occupation, status, or just your inhibitions. We must understand that the only way to break stigmas, is to popularize a taboo action. Women did the same when they threw out their restrictive girdles and bras, so it's time for us men to step up.
I was out at the store the other day, one which I always frequent. A familiar cashier said to me: "You know, it takes a lot of confidence to do what you do. It takes balls". Now, this is perhaps the most validating comment I have ever received, as many of us fear that our dressing makes us less of a man. I argue the complete opposite. How many men out there have the confidence to cross that line and wear a dress, in order to achieve their fullest happiness?
To those of you who just underdress, take that next step up! You don't have to go all in. Start slow. Begin with unisexual styles, perhaps adding in one clearly feminine item. Work your way up and eventually, you'll have the confidence to wear heels, full makeup, and whatever else you want openly! If you have a supportive partner, rely on them to support you. Vent your stresses at the end of the day to them, there is nothing more relieving than having someone there for you. If you don't have a partner, confide in a close friend or family member who accepts you.
Both XD and BA fully support us being ourselves. They exist because we exist. You may wonder why their product line mainly consists of underdressing items, and that's because the majority of us only underdress! Do you want more skirts, dresses, leggings or heels available to us? Buy them and wear them openly! XD / BA offers a decent amount of these, and they are most comfortable for us men! The more of us that look society in the eye and be confident with ourselves, the less of a stigma it becomes. Just look at women who wear tuxedos! No one bats an eye. It's time for a man in a dress to receive the same treatment.
So get out there and wear that dress you've been dying to wear in public! How many of you have taken these steps so far? How many of you want to? What is stopping you? I would love to help you all muster the courage and become truly blissful.
-Nathan
To start, a lot of the stigmas that we face have been brought on throughout decades of people like us hiding in the shadows. In doing so, the rest of society has become very ignorant as to who we are, why we do what we do, and what it means to us. We all have gotten one of the two assumptions: we're gay, or we want to be women. For some that may be true, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. However, the vast majority of us are straight, cis-gendered men.
In recent weeks, I have openly dressed in front of several individuals that had no idea about this side of me. Namely, it was my two sisters, one of their boyfriends, and stepdad. Out of these four, only one seemed to have a problem with it, which was my younger sister. She wasn't able to understand that I was not gay, and called it a "phase". These comments were made behind my back, so I wasn't able to respond accordingly. Luckily, my other sister explained to her that I have been in a relationship with a beautiful woman for over five years.
This example is just one of the many experiences that come along with being openly feminine. However, none of these situations deter me from being myself. While the opinions of immediate family or friends can hurt sometimes, it is important to understand that we live our lives for ourselves, and not according to anyone else's comforts. True friends and family will not judge you on this alone, and will still love and accept you regardless.
I have read many of your comments throughout various blogs, and it always saddens me when I read about those who do not have the confidence to wear the clothes they love openly, due to their fears of what others may think. I deeply empathize with this, as I was once in the same unfortunate position.
However, I have noticed many of you still underdress daily, as well as wear light makeup and perhaps a unisex top or bottom that goes unnoticed. Some of you also have wonderful partners in your life that encourage you to be your fullest self. So what is holding you back? Perhaps it's your occupation, status, or just your inhibitions. We must understand that the only way to break stigmas, is to popularize a taboo action. Women did the same when they threw out their restrictive girdles and bras, so it's time for us men to step up.
I was out at the store the other day, one which I always frequent. A familiar cashier said to me: "You know, it takes a lot of confidence to do what you do. It takes balls". Now, this is perhaps the most validating comment I have ever received, as many of us fear that our dressing makes us less of a man. I argue the complete opposite. How many men out there have the confidence to cross that line and wear a dress, in order to achieve their fullest happiness?
To those of you who just underdress, take that next step up! You don't have to go all in. Start slow. Begin with unisexual styles, perhaps adding in one clearly feminine item. Work your way up and eventually, you'll have the confidence to wear heels, full makeup, and whatever else you want openly! If you have a supportive partner, rely on them to support you. Vent your stresses at the end of the day to them, there is nothing more relieving than having someone there for you. If you don't have a partner, confide in a close friend or family member who accepts you.
Both XD and BA fully support us being ourselves. They exist because we exist. You may wonder why their product line mainly consists of underdressing items, and that's because the majority of us only underdress! Do you want more skirts, dresses, leggings or heels available to us? Buy them and wear them openly! XD / BA offers a decent amount of these, and they are most comfortable for us men! The more of us that look society in the eye and be confident with ourselves, the less of a stigma it becomes. Just look at women who wear tuxedos! No one bats an eye. It's time for a man in a dress to receive the same treatment.
So get out there and wear that dress you've been dying to wear in public! How many of you have taken these steps so far? How many of you want to? What is stopping you? I would love to help you all muster the courage and become truly blissful.
-Nathan
20 comments
Thanks for your great insight and perspective. I love wearing your sexy bras and pantries out with light makeup. Hope to make the jump to more soon. My spouse has trouble understanding my desires.
I think the stigma is slowly going to go away. Our society is so much freer now than it was say 10 years ago and 10 years ago it was freer that 10 years before that. It’s a progression and one that may be slow but 10 years ago I did not know this great site or products existed! Now is a great tome to be alive and free as we are able to express ourselves in any manner that we choose. We have ‘pronouns’ that we get to select. Men can wear panties from XDress! Women can wear underwear for men! We can be as sexual or asexual as we desire. I prefer sexual. We need to evolve and move forward with all our idiosyncrasies. “Normal” is really not a word as we all have something unique about us that makes us abnormal. Celebrate it! Discuss it! Break the stigma. I think we live at a great time and it is only getting better! Thank you XDress for your product! Whether you wear it in secret or proudly display it daily or lie somewhere in between, it is great! It doesn’t make you gay or make you want to be a woman. It should make you feel the best version of yourself!
Stevie and Nathan
Sounds like you rock it sweeties.
Ally x
Nathan and Ally and everyone
Its a great site to communicate with others like us…. yes the more u do and get away the more you try to get away with… i’ve expanded to light makeup- foundation, concealer and filling my eyebrows … on weekends tinted lip balm.
Panties always occasional bras femme jeans
One day stilettos with my skinny jeans
Wear something pretty today, I am
Stevie
Ally and Stevie,
It’s amazing that we all have our personal style that we are confident in, that still represents the core of who we are. Whether we choose to incorporate our dressing in our daily lives is a personal choice, but every time we step outside and expose our femininity, the more courageous we become. Isn’t it such an amazing feeling?
I personally go for a very elegant yet youthful feminine look, so frills, lace and satin are very common in my wardrobe. It’s bold, but its who I am and I am never ashamed of it.
Keep this lovely conversation going! I’m certainly enjoying it!
-Nathan